Empty arms... But trusting the Lord

The past week has been full of emotional highs as well as the lows. Unfortunately it all ended with a huge low. We arrived in VA the day after our son was born... Had a great visit for a full day with the birthmom, she left him with us in the hospital and we took him with us on Saturday. He was so sweet, so little and such a blessing to us. Unfortunately our plans are not always the Lords plans. That night, the lawyer contacted us and said birthmom wanted Benjamin back... It was the biggest shock... Because there was no indication that would happen. We had no choice but to cooperate. The moment we handed him back will forever be etched in my heart... Talk about pain! This was our son, and she was taking him back. We left for Maine the next day and have not heard from the birthmom again. My heart aches for Benjamin and we just pray that he is ok and will be ok. 

 We appreciate all the prayers and kind words from friends and family. We are doing ok, but it's still very hard for us. The Lord does know what He is doing, and we cling to that promise. Praise the Lord we are expecting our baby girl in August, and even though it doesn't take the pain away or replace Benjamin, it softens the blow slightly. 

 We are putting adoption on hold right now, Angel Adoption said we have 8 months left on their contract when we want to pursue it again... The only problem is the money... We spent all we had raised and saved on the lawyers and trip for Benjamin, so as of now, we have no funds to pursue again. We are still open to it, but we can not go through those emotions again while in the third trimester of Kelly's pregnancy. After our baby girl is born and finances settle a little, we will look into the option again... As long as the Lord leads us.  

Please continue praying, the pain is very real. Pray for Benjamin and birthmom, that she changes her ways and becomes a great mom for him. A blessing that came out of this is, I (Kelly), got to see how great a dad Justin will be. He was my rock and continues to be... He dealt with the lawyers and birthmom when I was too upset to do so, and he also loved that little guy and wanted to hold him to the end (even through tears) he was strong when I was weak.. He is an amazing man, and I am so lucky to have him in my life. 

 Thanks again for your prayers and support. We are so blessed with our friends and family. We will keep you all updated on our little girl as well as if we pursue adoption again. God bless.

450 pieces down, and 24 days left!

We are so thankful and blessed for what the Lord has done in our lives. We only have 50 pieces left of the puzzle! Thank you to everyone who has donated to get our precious Benjamin Tyshawn home! The birth mom, Dana, has been in contact with me and so far Benjamin is healthy and the c-section is still on for May 1st at 2pm. She seems upbeat and happy that we are adopting him. We also had good news from our lawyer - the birth father was located and said he will come to the hospital the day Benjamin is born and sign away his parental rights. Please pray that he shows up and that everything goes smoothly. We also need prayer that the lawyers will not run out of our retainer money... we are pretty tapped out and would not be sure how to pay them again ($7,500.00 total for the retainers). Prayers would be appreciated!! 

Another praise is that we spoke with St. Andre's about our pregnancy and they were excited for us! We were worried they would halt the adoption because of what the agency in Illinois had said, but nothing happened and everything is going smoothly with them! Praise the Lord! In case some people have not heard, we are expecting a girl on August 3rd... which is exciting! We will have a boy and a girl :) 

Kelly finishes teaching in a week (April 13th) and will have 2 weeks to get things ready before we leave for VA! Please pray for this transition... we are excited but its a huge change!

Thanks for your prayers and support... if you would like to donate for more puzzle pieces, see our address on the fundraiser letter tab. 

Here is the puzzle so far:

343 pieces sold and 63 days left!

Whew.... what a whirlwind the past few weeks have been! We are officially moved into our new house and loving it! I can't wait to get the nursery painted and set up for our little man's arrival! The official due date is May 1st at 2:00pm (c-section) - unless he busts out earlier ;). The birth mom, Dana, updates us about doctors visits and so far she said Benjamin is healthy and growing... and moving a lot! We are so excited for this blessing the Lord is giving us.

We have sold 343 pieces so far... thanks so much for your support and prayers! We have been told someone will be "purchasing" 50 pieces soon, so that would put us up to 393 pieces! amazing! But we do still need 500 sold and beyond would be so great! We will need money for travel, and possible medical expenses as well as more lawyer fees if the fees we already paid run out. So please be praying for us and if you feel led to donate, our address is on the fundraiser letter tab.

However, everyone can be praying for a few things: Dana's heart, of course... Benjamin's growth and birth coming soon... for our preparation's and hearts... also after our next ultrasound on March 12th (we will find out what baby #2 is!) we need to tell St. Andres that we are pregnant as well and are praying that this will not hurt the adoption. Our attorney said it should not hinder or cancel the adoption, however, please pray that St. Andres will not do something rash and forbid us to adopt Benjamin. That is our greatest prayer request right now!

I, Kelly, have also decided not to finish the school year out teaching, after Benjamin arrives. My last day at school is April 13th, which will give me two weeks to prepare before we head to Virginia! This was a hard decision, but a much needed one. I look forward to this new adventure :)

Thanks again for your prayers, love and support during this time... please remember us in prayer as the time quickly approaches!

321 pieces down! Praise the Lord!

The Lord has truly been doing amazing things in our lives, and just when I begin to feel overwhelmed and stressed that we won't be able to do this, the Lord gently reminds me that He has it all in His hands!

Our birth mother's name is Dana, and we have been in touch a few times since she chose us. We informed her that we were also expecting a baby, and told her we would also love to have her son as our own. She said she is delighted with the fact that he will have a sibling, and things are moving forward! We then had to mail down $5,000.00 to retain her lawyer in Virgina, and $3,500.00 to retain our lawyer here in Maine. We are not sure where we will get money for the remaining expenses, but are trusting the Lord in this. We have already spent almost $20,000.00 on this process. It's all worth it, but money is stressful! Angel Adoption was not too impressed that we were still wanting to adopt even though we are pregnant... it's their own personal opinion and thank the Lord that Dana still chose us! If she hadn't then they would have put us on hold until after we had our baby... crazy if you ask me!

We have also picked out a name for the baby - Benjamin Tyshawn Dayfield - Dana asked if we could fit the name Tyshawn in his name, and so to show respect we made it his middle name. Benjamin means "son of my right hand", and she was very happy his name was going to be Biblical.

Our second born (due August 3rd) is doing well! We heard the heartbeat last week and are so thrilled that the baby is healthy and doing well.

It also looks as if we will be closing on our new house very soon, which is another stresser, but a good one! The Lord is truly our Provider! We are very excited to close soon and get settled before April. Benjamin will arrive sometime around April 28th, she is going to have a c-section, which works out great because then we know exactly when we have to be there for the birth. We will travel down by car and they say it could take up to 10 business days to get the paperwork cleared for us to travel over state lines with him. Justin will have to fly back for work, and I'm talking my mother into flying down to travel back with me and Benjamin (it won't take much convincing, she is very excited :).

Much prayer is needed! Pray for Dana during this time, pray for her heart and emotional state. Pray for both babies that they remain healthy and growing the way they should! Also, Dana can back out at any time, even up to 2 months after we have Benjamin (or until we appear before the judge to make him legally ours) - pray she does not recant - that would be unbelievably hard. Pray for money, that it would come when needed for this process and that there would be no question that the Lord is in this! And lastly please pray for us... that we would remain clinging to the Lord and each other during this time! Thank you so much for your love, support and prayers!

Here is our puzzle so far:

261 Pieces Sold, & POISSIBLE ADOPTION!

Hello everyone! I hope and pray this finds you all doing well and that you had a great Christmas and a blessed New Year!

Exciting things have been happening in every aspect of our lives... Justin got a new job which will enable me to stay at home when we have kids, we are most likely going to be signing on our new house this month, AND..... We are pregnant! The baby is due August 3rd! After two years of praying and trying to be patient, the Lord has provided... And so far (keep praying) the baby is healthy. We will head in on January 19th to hear the heart beat.

Another wonderful blessing is that today we were chosen by a birthmother! Isn't it crazy how the Lord works? The baby is full African American and is a boy due April 28th! Please pray fervently that all goes well. We will tell her that we are pregnant as well after we hear the heartbeat, but please pray she does not change her mind when she hears that... Because we have not changed ours!

All that being said, we have another prayer request, as well as a plea.... We are lacking money for the adoption, although we know the Lord will provide, we also are asking for others help. We probably need about $5,000.00 more. We are saving as much as we can, but do need help. If that is not possible then please just pray that everything would work and fall into place.

Thank you so much for your love and support along this journey... It seems so surreal right now, but we know if this is meant to be, then the Lord will provide a way. The Lord is good!

Will keep you posted on the process, thanks for your prayers.

God's Continued Blessing - 241 pieces sold!

This week has been such a blessing! Just as I was feeling discouraged, some money was given for our puzzle from a few different families, which brought our count up to 241! Wow were we reminded of God's providence and His grace in our lives! Our adoption profile was sent out about 14 times in November, so that is encouraging, we are just waiting on the Lord's timing and we know it will happen with His help. 

This is a hard journey, but a good one... it has really taught me reliance on the Lord and not on my own power. Please continue to pray for the process - our hearts, and our future family. Thanks for all your prayers and support! We feel so loved! 

172 pieces sold and update.

We are up to 172 pieces this week! Thanks to all who have given towards our adoption.

We had some unfortunate news this week. About 2 weeks ago, Angel Adoption contacted us and we were actually assigned to a birth mother. We sent $500 to her attorney so they could meet for the first time. After that meeting, no one has heard from the birth mother. The lawyer and Angel Adoption attempted to contact her, and there is still no word. I heard on Thursday that they are closing the file on her and we are moving on. I was crushed... having already given my heart to that little unborn baby. We also lost that $500, because it went to pay for the first meeting. Its been hard, but it actually reaffirmed our commitment to adopt.

Please continue to pray for us and our hearts... we need to live out the verse "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jer. 29:11

We trust the Lord in all things, but some days it is harder to live out then other days. Please pray for patience and trust, as well as our relationship with each other as we prepare our hearts and home for the little bundle that will hopefully soon bless our lives.